"Lord," I asked, trembling. "Is that you?"
"I am but a messenger of the Lord, here on Earth."
"Well, then where's God."
"He's..." The bush paused. "He's making a phone call."
Suddenly the sound of a Giant Toliet Flushing filled the sky, and I heard a Large Door open and close up in the heavens.
"Bush," spoke a voice mightily. "We are almost out of toliet paper."
The bush shuffled his feet awkwardly.